Das Valterland says: Brits and cockroaches, both vile

Don’t blame me for the title of this blog. I actually have no opinion on comparing Brits to cockroaches. I think they actually did it to themselves in this case.

So I’m readying my Essential German phrase book again and remembered there was another section that was especially entertaining in the bed and breakfast section. While I don’t stay in many German hotels, unless we’re counting my car, I figure it can’t hurt to know a little hotel lingo.

So, directly following the, How do I order a hotel room/pay for it/talk about the bedding/bathroom/breakfast, I run across another section specifically for hotel room complaints.

Of course there is.

I’ll summarize the first half of the page, as it’s your pretty standard, too much noise, turn down the music, not enough linens, x, y and z are broken and then lots of phrases about how to complain about your bed. Then we get to the real problems at the very bottom of the page, which are appropriately ranked and categorized, if you’re looking at this like a German or maybe even an American.

Here’s the last 3 phrases this book finds it essential that you be able to complain about at a hotel.

We have trouble with bugs/insects: Wir haben Arger mit ungeziefer/insekten

This place is full of: Es wimmelt hier von
Mosquitos: mucken
Cockroaches: kakerlaken
Brits: Briten

Haaaaaaaaa.

I have to laugh again. Sorry, just wait a minute.

Haaaaaaaaaaaa.

Yes, I suppose it would be smart to know when to complain about your hotel being full of Brits. I mean cockroaches. Anyway, I won’t be blamed for picking on anyone today. Blame the book. I am merely just the messenger.

Cockroaches.