I’m changing professions

So this is why I’m not writing much lately:
1. I’ve been with random gay French men that do not wear clothes in public
2. Spending time with family
3. Working on wrapping up conference details
4. Being the opposite of sober
5. All of the above minus number 3 which isn’t a good enough excuse to take a break from writing

If you didn’t pick number 5, we are NOT FRIENDS. Obviously number 5.

So. That leaves me harassing gay men (a new personal hobby), traveling with family and drinking the adult juice. And by God it has been FUN.

Because giving out free sparklers with each bottle of gin ordered at the club makes sense. So does shoving it in your mouth.


I’ve had so much fun lately that my body is shutting down. Honestly. For the past two days straight (while not drinking adult juice) I have woken up feeling like a goddamned train just smashed me in the face while elves are stabbing my throat with escargot forks while my organs have all joined forces and are trying to escape out of my jage. If you’ve never woke up feeling like that, you are 1. missing out and 2. fucking boring.

So. While I draft tomorrow’s story about my new topless experiences in gay bars (gay bars with SHOWERS IN THEM OH.MY.GOD), here’s what I thought was a wicked good first draft of my new web design for The Heather Chronicles.

new-heather-chronicles-preview

Sorry about the fact that you have to rotate this picture I drew but spoiler alert, I am a fucking pdf magician as well. Bonus!

As you can see from the above, my drawing skills (and scanning and pdfing) are at an all-time high, as is my creative productivity.

So should I be a web designer or an artist? OR BOTH.

Both? I thought so.